


Shudder before the beautiful

by sepherim_ml



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Curse Breaking, Fairy Tale Retellings, Little Mermaid Elements, M/M, merman!Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-25
Updated: 2019-11-25
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:01:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21562666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sepherim_ml/pseuds/sepherim_ml
Summary: Once upon a time there was a witch with yellow eyes and breath of fire. The witch bestowed her protection to the animals and creatures who lived near the lake she took as refuge, but she threatened the humans; no human could cross the borders of her domain, no human hand could touch anything close to the lake where she lived.It was just a story, until Castiel got cursed and turned into a merman, bound to remain a prisoner of the witch forever...
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 52





	Shudder before the beautiful

Written for 2019 spnreversebang held on LJ for the amazingly beautiful artwork by [Aggiedoll](https://aggiedoll.livejournal.com/)   
Thanks to the mods for the help and for helding this challenge every year!  
Thanks to my beta [Iria 4285](https://archiveofourown.org/users/iria4285/pseuds/iria4285/) for the super-speedy help and of course thanks to my darling [weeping_ice](https://archiveofourown.org/users/weeping_ice) for the cheering <3

Title has been taken from the song "Shudder before the beautiful" by Nightwish, who I listened while writing the whole fanfic.

art by [Aggiedoll](https://aggiedoll.livejournal.com/)

There were stories told by old men and passed on to the youngers while sitting around the fireplace. Castiel had grown up with them, just like every other child in his village.

The legend of the Witch of the Lake was one of his favourite stories. His brothers used to make fun of Castiel because they preferred stories of brave knights who killed dragons, mountain trolls and cruel fairies, but Castiel preferred the marine underworld, so far from the routine and their hardships.

So, Castiel dreamt, letting his imagination flow and bring him to another world full of magic.

Once upon a time there was a witch with yellow eyes and breath of fire. After being cast out from the Seven Hells, the witch found refuge in a peaceful lake near the very same village Castiel and his family lived in. The witch bestowed her protection to the animals and creatures who lived in near the lake, but she threatened the humans; no human could cross the borders of her domain, no human hand could touch anything close to the lake where she lived.

Some men didn't believe the legend and approached the lake, but never came back. Metatron himself, the oldest storyteller of the village, claimed to have lost his sight when he wandered too close of it in a dark night. For a brief moment, before the witch cursed him, Metatron was amazed by the abundance of the lake; all around there were all types of trees and flowers, wild animals were sleeping peacefully and magical creatures were playing around the lake.

Castiel's fervid imagination, fuelled by the rumors made it easy to, keep thinking about the lake, until one fateful day, he saw the Witch of the Lake with his own eyes.

It was during a dread night, when rain was pouring down and thunder roared. Castiel was hunting in the woods with his brothers and lost them in the storm. He tried to find refuge, at least for the time being, and, with no direction, he found himself wandering near the lake. Under the branches of a majestic weeping willow, he found a natural haven.

Trembling from the cold, Castiel wrapped himself in his too short cloak while watching around him with wide eyes; the lake was weirdly calm, no ripple was disturbing the surface, no drop of rain touched the mirror of water, all around, small fairies danced in neat line-ups, elegant and full of grace.

Realising where he was, Castiel's heart started to beat faster and faster. Nevertheless, no witch was around, no punishment arrived, so he decided to remain still for the time being and try to dry his clothes.

Out of the corner of his eye, Castiel caught something moving.

Looking down, Castiel could see a big fish swimming down just under the surface of the lake, so close that he could reach it and grab it. He could bring the fish home, give it to his little sister who was always hungry. The famine that had swept around the region brought Castiel's village on their knees; then heavy rains flooded the fields, ruining what little they could have harvested.

Without thinking, Castiel's hand grabbed the fish, who started to struggle. Immediately, a thunder roared and, full of fear, Castiel let go of his prize, standing up. The circle fairies stopped dancing and became still, trembling, their light dimmed. Now the lake was gurgling, fizzing and twirling. A beautiful red-headed woman emerged from the surface, her face twisted with anger.

"No human hand should touch my realm!" Her deep voice made Castiel tremble.

Before he could justify himself, ask for forgiveness, a pang of intense pain hit his legs; writhing in pain, Castiel screamed and screamed. He fell into the cold water, dragged down by a mysterious force, his hands clasped into nothing, uselessly, trying to reach the surface while gasping for air.

"You're part of my realm now."

Castiel looked down, his legs had disappeared, instead, a big, greenish tail was swiping back and forth, whipping in the water. His chest felt tight, but his breath was quick, no water entered his lungs.

Yellow eyes were watching him, angry no more. The witch's voice was now mellow, almost loving. "No human hand will touch my realm. You shall see."

****

There were stories of older times. Dean had grown up with them, just like every other child. Mom had used to tell him a nursery rhyme before putting him into bed; she was the healer of the village and she knew all of the beneficial proprieties of plants and words like "fairies", "mermaids", "dragons" and "spirits" rolled from her mouth easily. It was not seldom she would thank the fairies for her luck in finding specific ingredients for her ointments.

Dean was the only boy in the village who knew the most about fairy people and how to heal a rash. His younger brother Sammy wasn't as lucky, because when he was little a fire burned down their home and Mom with it.

Then, it was too difficult to retell those stories; to remember the old times when happiness was all around, remembering made Dean's heart sank in his chest. After Mom's death, life, was never like before.

"Hey, Sammy," Dean sat down on the bench near his brother. Some locals were gawking at Sam with weird eyes, both curious and suspicious of the book Sam was reading. Oh yeah, nice way of blending in, but Sam was so stubborn sometimes.

"You know what sweet Jo has told me?" Dean nodded at the beautiful blond waitress behind the counter. The inn was full, but Jo had spotted them straight away and brought two pints of beers as soon as they sat down at the table; it was her mother, Ellen Harvelle, who had called them in her small village and Jo was way too invested in chatting to strangers.

"Where her room is?" suggested Sammy with an amused smile.

"What kind of a guy do you think I am?" Dean defended himself. Truth to be told, he was sure that if he dared to put a hand on the blondie, her mother would castrate him. Ellen was a legendary figure in _their_ world, a fearless woman who nobody wanted to be in her bad list. "We have work to do."

Sam rolled his eyes, putting aside his book. "So?"

"There's a witch in the village nearby," Dean felt almost giddy at that. Ellen had sent a message to come for a different problem, but it was one they could solve it quickly. Once they got payed, maybe the other villagers could hire them. "She cast a spell on a lake, ten men disappeared in the last two months alone."

"But nobody has asked for help?" Cases like this were always problematic; people were too scared, too suspicious, preferred to keep the known evil instead of just asking for help and enrolled the Hunters.

Dean shrugged. "Maybe they're too frightened to do it."

"Fine."

"We move at dawn. We need to finish this work soon." It was a favour for Ellen; Dean remembered Dad's stories on the Harvelles, especially on Ellen's husband, who died during a hunt when Joanna was only two. In a sort of code of honour, Ellen's case was put forward to everything and the Elders sent the best Hunters they had available - the Winchester brothers - to take care of the issue.

Indeed, they finished the work quickly as promised. Half a day later, silver blades just cleaned from the blood, Dean and Sam returned to the inn; Jo welcomed them with generous slices pie and Ellen commented proudly they were really John Winchester's sons.

"But don't become assholes like him," she scolded them, giving them the promised reward.

Sam gladly agreed. "We won't." Nothing would make him happier than become the exact opposite of Dad's, but, unfortunately - and unknowingly to Sam - he was resembling their Dad more and more.

Dean, though, was another story.

There were times when Dad, dead-drunk, would mumble how much Dean looked like Mary. Those nights, Dean was relieved Dad decided to hunt with others; travelling without listening to Dad and Sam's shouting contest was doing miracles for his ears, but nothing would hurt him most than being compared to Mom.

After parting from Ellen and Jo, the brothers started their journey to the nearest village. The night approached when they were still in the woods, so they camped out, lighting up a fire.

"Dean? Are you asleep?"

"No, thanks to you," Dean complained, peeking at his brother. Sam was on patrol tonight and he had a somber expression on his face. "What?"

"What Ellen told us - " Sam sighed. "You know, I never wanted to be like _him_."

"I know."

"But I'm _exactly_ like him. I left everything behind when Jess died. I joined the Hunters guild to find her assassin."

Jess died in the same way as Mom. Burned by fire, in her own home. It was by chance that Sam wasn't there with her, but that night he was away. A fact he never forgave himself. After her innatural death, it was easy for Dad to convince Sam to join the family business and start hunting.

"You decided that, Sam. You regret it?" Dean was tired, but also disappointed. Sam came back for vengeance and stayed for Dean.

The sense of guilt prevented Sam to answer. Dean rolled on the side, and fell fast asleep.

***

There were stories of older times. Castiel couldn't identify which of them came from his _"before <"i>, which of them from his _"now <"i>.__

___Before_ , when he was a human boy, he had brothers, a sister, a head full of dreams and a secluded life with lots of insecurities. Storytellers created magical universes with their words full of the good and the evil of the world; fairies were evil creatures, all that wasn't human was scary and threatening._ _

___Now_ Castiel was a merman, trapped in an enchanted lake, unable to live on land among humans, unable to escape, forever prisoner of the Witch. Fairies whispered in his ears, describing a world full of evil humans who crushed their stone circles, who cast them out from the woods, who killed each other._ _

__What is good or bad, _now_?_ _

__Castiel flipped his black tail back and forth, watching with fascination how his scales changed from pitch black to deep green when the rays of sun touched the surface of the lake. How long had he been there? Time was so fleeting, so volatile._ _

__None of this brothers had come for him. Castiel called and called, no one answered._ _

__Sometimes, he saw humans trespassing the Witch's realm. Some hurried away, some got tempted and the Witch resurfaced from the deep cave of the lake to cast her spell. One man lost his legs, one got transformed in a crow, another lost his sight, and so on._ _

__No one remained with Castiel. Unable to speak with his own kind, Castiel stopped using his voice. Fairies, fishes, birds, all had their own language and Castiel could understand them, but his voice was not necessary to communicate._ _

__Days and nights passed in loneliness until, one day, he saw another human trespassing. Castiel knew that calling his attention to warn him would only raise more curiosity or even alert the Witch ahead of time. One woman got cursed because of this in the past._ _

__So, Castiel remained silent._ _

__Spying him from behind the tree, he followed the human movements and Castiel noticed immediately that he was not a _normal_ human, but had something different. First of all, his eyes were watching around wary, but otherwise he remained calm and collected, as if seeing groups of dancing fairies hovering in the air was something he could see every day, then a weapon appeared on his hands, gleaming under the sunlight._ _

__Slowly, Castiel slipped underwater and hid behind the big roots of the weeping willow. The human wielding the weapon was not alone, another man, taller than him, followed closely behind. They looked well coordinated and they kept looking at each other, clearly people who were used to fight together._ _

__It happened quickly. First, the taller man's fingers touched the carved symbols on the oak trunk, whispering something, then the lake started to twirl, announcing the Witch's arrival._ _

__Without really thinking, Castiel screamed with raspy voice: "Don't look her in the eyes!" Realising that was the first human words since years, Castiel stopped, unsure, looking at the scene in front of him with wide eyes and deeply shocked. He wandered if the humans had heard of his warning or if he had actually signed their death sentence. One of them had touched a tree, but the other could still escape._ _

__The Witch emerged, dressed only by seaweed and lichen, her scary face barely covered by long red hair. "How dare you touch what is mine! No human hand shall touch what I have created!"_ _

__"Dean!" The tall man's legs planted on the ground and started shifting into wood, mimicking the oak trunk his fingers had inadvertently touched. Although, the human called Dean heard Castiel's warning, he turned his head away and didn't look the Witch’s yellow eyes._ _

__Still turned, Dean threw something at the Witch and his aim must had been admirable because whatever he threw, it hit her on the face. The Witch yelled in pain, her spell lost effect midway._ _

__"Sammy!"_ _

__The sand-haired man reached for the other, preventing him from falling down. Blood was spilling from the long legs and Castiel watched with horror while the Witch launched herself underwater, screaming, leaving the two men still alive. Her face, a mask of flesh and blood, was the last thing Castiel saw before she disappeared._ _

__"Don't move!" Dean looked around, pressing on the wounds of the other man. "I need to find the ingredients for the counterspell, press on the wound!" After the taller man - Sammy, Castiel corrected himself - nodded, Dean grabbed a small bowl and some herbs from his bag. With fast movements, he mixed the ingredients, then stopped abruptly. "Damn, hold still!" He ran towards the weeping willow, holding his knife._ _

__Remembering that the various parts of the willow had many medical properties, Castiel realised Dean's intentions. "Wait!" Again, Castiel's voice came out raspy, his thoart hurted. The man stopped on his tracks, but kept the knife raised, ready to attack in case of danger. "If you touch anything here, you'll be cursed."_ _

__"The Witch is dead." Even Dean's voice seemed unconvinced. Castiel kept staring, until Dean raised an eyebrow and pointed to the other man. "He's my brother," he explained, and his eyes were full of fear. "I need some willow bark."_ _

__Castiel offered his hand; thin, greenish membranes connected his fingers and Dean stared at them with suspiciousness. "Give me the knife, I'll take what you need. I am already cursed."_ _

__Maybe there was something in his face that made Dean trust his plead, maybe it was just the urgency, but the human finally gave him the knife. The silver blade was heavy and carved with runes along with mysterious symbols._ _

__Hoping it would work, Castiel followed Dean's instructions and then handed the precious willow bark to the human. Nothing happened, the Witch remained in the lake and Dean ran towards his brother to finish his medicine. Castiel swam closer, watching them with curiosity. Sam drank the mixture and, after a long minute, his legs stopped bleeding._ _

__"No more pain?"_ _

__"None, thanks, Dean," Sam's voice was rough, the forehead was dripping with sweat and he looked exhausted. His legs were still trembling. "We still need to kill the Witch."_ _

__Dean looked at Castiel. "What is your name?"_ _

__"Castiel."_ _

__"Well, Cas, thanks," Dean sat on the ground. "You said you were cursed?"_ _

__Castiel nodded._ _

__"You were human?"_ _

__Castiel nodded again._ _

__"That's why my knife didn't hurt you," said Dean._ _

__Unconsciously, Castiel's tail started to move back and forth, betraying his nervousness. "What are you?"_ _

__"Hunters, we kill, well, evil creatures, like that Witch."_ _

__"Will you kill her?"_ _

__"You bet we are."_ _

__"What will happen to me?"_ _

__"You'll be human again."_ _

__Castiel wasn't sure it was a good idea. No one was left for him. All has changed. The only sure things left for him were that lake, the merry folks who lived around it and, why not, also the Witch who was protecting it from the decadence humans were spreading everywhere. A little guilty, he tried to understand since when he had started to think more like a creature instead like a human; since when he turned his head to the chance to be human again._ _

__Castiel was scared now. _Before_ had become a distant past. _Now_ was something Castiel was used to. _ _

__

__***_ _

__

__There were stories and _real_ stories. Mom told Dean that all legends came from real events, that monsters were real and not always were creatures, sometimes they were human._ _

__The lake was flat as a mirror, no ripple disturbed the quiet surface, except under the branches of the centuries-old weeping willow, with the green tips of it brushing the water. From his position, Dean could admire how the ginormous knobby roots sank underwater, creating intricate wooden labyrinths where frogs and fishes where playing._ _

__The whole weeping willow was surrounded by small fairies, something normally would disturb him, but until they kept staying away, Dean had more important things to do. Sam was sleeping, his hands still holding Dad's old diary. They had interrogated Castiel - the merman - trying to come up with a plan, then Sam had started to feel sick until, too tired to keep his eyes open, he finally fell asleep._ _

__Blocking a powerful spell brought always consequences and Dean was aware that now they needed to act fast. It worried him that Sam was so unwell._ _

__"How long have you been like this?"_ _

__Castiel was resting his arms on the lakeside, pressing his elbows on the green grass. He had the most peculiar gaze, deep blue eyes who scrutinized everything, Dean included, with gravity. His pale skin was greenish, except for some silver scales scattered around his face, from his wide forehead down to the neck, which gave Castiel's face a gleaming opalescence._ _

__"I lost count of the seasons," Castiel admitted. Was the truth? Dean never trusted monsters, but was Castiel really one of them? More like a poor idiot who did the wrong thing to the wrong witch. "You're from the Hunters guild, do you often take care of _this_?"_ _

__"Crazy witches? Mermen? Yeah, usually not together."_ _

__Castiel's eyes darkened, the blue iris became almost black. Who knows what he was thinking. "Fairies told me about stories on Hunters, not happy ones. They told Hunters kill everything that is not human."_ _

__"Fairies!" Dean snorted, glancing at the fairies sitting above his head, on the branches of the tree. "I bet they are. We Hunters swore to protect humans from monsters, evil things."_ _

__"Am I? An evil thing, I mean."_ _

__"You're just cursed, we'll free you." Castiel seemed almost disappointed at Dean's certainty. "What is your problem?"_ _

__Castiel coiled under the water, almost ready to bolt._ _

__"Wait!" Dean tried to come up with something to keep the merman there. Fearing that Castiel would swim to the Witch to betray them, Dean stopped the other. "It's going to be fine, soon you'll be a man again."_ _

__"Little is left for me," Castiel admitted, looking away, and Dean finally understood. How many years Castiel has been there, secluded from the human world? No news from his family, no human company, almost completely alone, condemned to see men and women approach the lake and get cursed._ _

__"You'll find your way," he stretched his hand out, but stopped in time. For a brief moment, Dean let his guard down, almost touching Castiel's head, just tor reassure him, risking to be cursed._ _

__Castiel looked at Dean's hand, still frozen mid-air, like he wanted nothing than to be patted on the head. He longed so much for human touch that the desire was showing in his eyes, mouth, face. Even more than before, Dean wanted to give Castiel that little real contact, and he felt awful when he pulled away and pressed both hands in his pockets._ _

__How did it feel not being touched for decades? How can a person - a human - live for years without touching or being touched by another human being?_ _

__Dean's eyes started to tingle while thinking that. He watched his brother, still asleep, and he felt the luckiest man in the world. Castiel looked crestfallen, though, and Dean swore to himself to fix it. He didn't really know why, but he hated to see Castiel with that expression on his face, the pain and loneliness so evident it was almost palpable in the air._ _

__"I'll help you find a way, whichever way. I promise, you'll not be alone."_ _

__

__*_ _

__

__There were stories about Hunters in both worlds; humans would evoke their adventures with eyes and words full of wonder, non-humans would speak of them in the most fearful, hateful way._ _

__Hunters was one of the stories Castiel hadn’t believed in. Nevertheless, here they were._ _

__Looking at the brothers arguing in front of him made him feel nostalgic of his own kin. At the same time, a warm feeling was spreading in his chest; Dean swore to him that he wouldn’t be alone and, despite that the promise came from someone he met a day ago, Castiel _believed_ it._ _

__There was a moment when Dean's hand was almost on his head. A touch that didn't brush against his skin, but left almost a scar on him, the mark that something was there, waiting for him. _Dean was waiting_. Castiel didn't really know why that thought formed in his mind - maybe it was desperation, maybe fervent hope, maybe a wish - but it was now safely planted inside his brain. _ _

__Sam and Dean discussed on a plan as soon as the lake started to resonate under the push of something under the surface. The Witch was gathering her force, trying to heal, plotting her revenge._ _

__"Are you in?" Sam asked him earlier. His legs were immobilized, nothing Dean could do prevented it. The legs were still of human flesh, but hard as tree trunks. Little by little the Witch was getting stronger and faster her spell kept progressing._ _

__"Yes," the merman answered. His voice was firm and determined, mirroring his state of mind. "I'm ready."_ _

__Dean nodded, proud. He stretched his hand out and Castiel felt almost tears pricking in his eyes when he touched those fingers._ _

__Feeling bold, the merman squeezed and pressed a soft kiss on them. His intention was to smell Dean's human skin, but it felt more an excuse that a deliberate decision from his part. Both Winchester brothers seemed surprised, but when the center of the lake gurgled, their attention was caught up._ _

__"Now, go!"_ _

__The Witch's face was scarred, her finger pointed to Dean, who didn't avert his eyes, but before she could curse him, Sam shot with his crossbow, hitting the Witch on both eyes. At the same time, Dean shot too, hitting her at the shoulder with her hooked arrows, which grasped on her flesh. The Witch screamed when both men started to pull and dragged her towards them._ _

__The poisoned blade was ready on Dean's hand, but the Witch wriggled out, almost tearing herself up from the hooks. She managed to snag Dean's blade and threw it away. It was then that Castiel, after giving a couple hard swipes with his tail and propelling from the hips until he broke the surface, touched the Witch._ _

__She let out a desperate scream, the skin Castiel was touching started to burn, but he didn't move away. Gritting his teeth, Castiel resisted, even when the water slammed him on the ground._ _

__Then, with one final spur, the Witch crumbled in agony. As soon as life left her body, magic crushed around her; the tall trees cracked, men and women punished by the Witch returned to their original form, Castiel included._ _

__

__*_ _

__

__All the good stories had Love as the force who propelled everything. In this case, it was curiousness, but when he saw Castiel laying on the ground, completely still, Dean felt pure terror. He checked if Sam was okay, but his brother was already standing up, finally cured and without permanent issues._ _

__"Cas!"_ _

__Dean threw himself beside the merman, clinging on his hand. The Witch, or what is left of her, sank inside the lake, finally dead, killed by the touch of her own creature._ _

__Castiel's tail glowed and two long, white legs appeared, scales disappeared, along with the membranes among his fingers. The glow disappeared and Castiel was now laying down on the mud, human again. As soon as he opened his eyes he gave a quick glance to his legs and his hand grabbed Dean's shirt._ _

__"Dean."_ _

__They were kissing before realising it. Castiel's lips were soft and cold, almost like his wet fingers, but different from a small, fleeting touch. It started as a simple press of lips, but the pressure slowly changed. A deep sense of fulfillment spread into Dean's chest. One happy ending finally was in his arms._ _

__Castiel was still naked in his arms and only when he started to tremble for the cold, Dean stopped the kiss and pulled away. He felt almost giddy when Castiel left out a soft, disappointed sound. "You need to cover, Cas."_ _

__Sam was close and handed Castiel some clothes that the man started to put on. Dean averted his eyes and stood up, catching the amusement in his brother's eyes. "What?"_ _

__"That was one fast true love kiss," snorted Sam, laughing._ _

__"Cas was already free from the curse, idiot." A deep red coloured his cheeks, but Dean was smiling. "You're such a softie, Samantha."_ _

__Sam patted Dean's shoulder. "So, now where to?"_ _

__They both knew protocol would require them to go back to the guild immediately, but for different reasons, both weren’t really looking forward to it._ _

__A chill wind whipped Dean's face, while the lake slowly started to darken. Dusk painted the sky with long orange fingers, group of fairies were still there, not worried as they started to sing._ _

__Castiel grabbed his hand. He looked funny in Dean's clothes, but his gaze was serious. "I want to see my village." Other people were wandering around, keeping away from the Hunters, some were crying, some were running to their long lost families._ _

__Castiel was one of the oldest ones here. There will probably no one left of his family but Dean respected his decision._ _

__"Let's go."_ _


End file.
